Connect Committee member, Holly, talks about her experience attending the Free Loaves on Fridays event at Berwick Literary Festival in October 2024.

I recently travelled to Berwick Literary Festival to attend the Free Loaves on Fridays Q&A. It was my first time at a literary festival and being part of an audience exploring hundreds of personal stories about the care experience. 

Prior to the event, I was unsure what to expect… 

I did think, “Who will attend? What would be their story or interest that led them to attend? Are they foster carers? Individuals who are, or have been, looked after?”  

The unknown is intriguing and fosters room for imagination or assumptions.  

I opted to imagine that it would be a space where people would attend with a curious, open mind – and this was affirmed during my time there. 

“The atmosphere was one of openness and safety”

Sitting in the audience, particularly at the beginning, I could sense the seriousness. It was discussed that, if people were impacted in any way, they were able to leave at any moment.  

As the event began, it was evident that participants came with a genuine interest in understanding the challenges faced by those with care experiences. Many attendees purchased copies of the Free Loaves on Fridays book, flipping through its pages or reading over the blurb whilst they were there.  

Throughout the event, you could see people relaxing and being more open. This openness facilitated deeper discussions about identity, resilience, and the emotional impact of care experiences.  

I felt a sense of happiness, knowing people wanted to invest their time and efforts into understanding the lived experiences of many individuals whose voice may not have been shared before Free Loaves on Friday was created and published.  

As someone who has their own lived experience of being looked after, it took a long time to recognise that I wanted to share my story through an outlet, but I’m still figuring out how I want that to look.  

My observations also came with an overwhelming sense of pride. I feel so proud to be part of a community that defies the odds. 

My initial uncertainty about what to expect at the event meant I could be present throughout the Q&A. With there being no room for comparison, I could absorb every feeling and thought. The atmosphere throughout the event was one of openness and safety. 

“It’s a small book to hold, but a mighty one to read”

I had read extracts from the book before attending Berwick Literary Festival, mainly the chapter with written letters. It’s a small book to hold, but a mighty one to read. I found it was easier to read in stages, at my own pace. 

Hearing extracts from the book read out loud reinforced that people have lived through these experiences – there is a whole community of individuals who have their own story. 

Often people cross paths in day-to-day life without knowing each other’s circumstances. The audience may not have experienced events such as the ones in the book, so witnessing people listening meant a small demographic of people were having their voice heard.  

The audience acted with such compassion and empathy, with a genuine interest, whilst making a conscious effort to ask questions in a respectful manner.  

“Rebekah’s voice made the sounds fall out of the room”

I found myself engrossed when Rebekah (the book’s editor and one of the panellists) was reading out her letter.  Previously reading it several times in the book had felt raw, but hearing it in Rebekah’s voice made the sounds fall out of the room. 

It made me think about my own experiences and my own case notes that I read, followed by the many emotions that merge into one. It made me feel like I wasn’t alone and that I could resonate with her on a level that many individuals may not understand.  

Rebekah and the rest of the panel discussed in length that self-belief and self-identity is something that can be difficult to find, which is true for many.  

For example, moving from placement to placement meant that I was exposed to many ways of living, and I picked up bits and pieces as I went along. By the time it came to going to university, like many people, I had no idea who I was, with little support to guide me through that next chapter in my life.  

At the bold age of 25, I’m still figuring out who I am – and I’m ok with that. 

“Exposing societal narratives”

During the discussion, Rebekah asked the audience to write five words relating to children in care.  

I watched the room, particularly the couple next to me, as they wrote their words associated with children in care.  

The audience wrote things such as “a child in need”, “no stability”, and “resilient’”.  

There was a huge percentage of negative connotations written, reflecting the societal narratives often imposed on care-experienced individuals. We’re often written about as statistics or published in government reports alongside number-crunching data, suggesting we’re a strain on the public purse.  

Hearing answers from the audience meant that they were understanding – they understood that we deserve the right to live a fulfilling life, with opportunities to better our situations.

“The opportunity to take something away”

It felt special to be among the audience.  

I grew up sitting amongst social work professionals when it came to the decisions surrounding my life – and now that I’ve made the choice to become a social worker, I’m sitting with more social workers than I’d ever anticipated.  

Sitting within a room, not knowing anyone’s reasoning for choosing to attend, meant that I held respect for each person who came. They purchased a ticket, they purchased a book, they used their time on a very early Sunday morning to come and listen.  

The event will have impacted different people in different ways, giving them the opportunity to take away what they felt was important.

“Inspiring empowerment that advocates for change”

The event raised awareness about the experiences of individuals in care, encouraging people to reflect on their perceptions of children in care and the challenges faced by care-experienced individuals.  

It also reinforced the encouragement for self-reflection. After the Q&A event, I practised my own self-care habits and took myself for a walk around beautiful Berwick.  

For me to be emotionally available within all aspects of what I do, I feel I need to be prepared. Walking through Berwick with a cup of coffee allowed me to relax into the day. With it being a Sunday, the streets remained quiet, allowing me to absorb my surroundings.  

As a literary festival, it was a great way to empower a group of individuals through the medium of writing. This empowerment can inspire others to share their narratives and advocate for change, which is something I’m very passionate about. 

Holly, Connect member and Connect Committee member.

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