Having both been fortunate enough to grow up in loving and supportive homes, we wanted to provide this same opportunity for other children. We moved home to give us the space we needed and one of us took the brave step of giving up our career to become a full-time carer. 

One of the hardest parts of our fostering journey was knowing where to start.  There was so much information available, but it left so many questions and we were struggling to understand all the different options. We were drawn to TACT because of their ethos and because we didn’t agree with other organisations profiting from fostering services.  Any surplus income TACT make is used to support their carers and the children they look after, and this sat well with us.  We found the website informative, but quickly made the leap to picking up the phone and talking to one of their team.  This really started to bring things to life, and we soon felt confident that TACT were right for us.

There’s no hiding from the fact that the process is intensive and may at times feel a little intrusive, but we were always clear that this was part of the journey and understood how important it was that children were fostered into loving and caring homes.  Our Assessing Social Worker took time to build a relationship with us, and soon it felt natural to talk about everything and anything. It was a two-way process though and it allowed us to ask questions, explore what we wanted from fostering and ultimately helped to prepare us for our first placement. 

We never doubted our choice to work with TACT and felt extremely well supported from start to finish.  The Fostering Panel was nowhere near as intimidating as we expected it to be and we felt well prepared to answer any questions that they had.  It was lovely to see that they had taken the time to read all of our paperwork, and they showed a genuine interest in us and our experiences.

It was always our aim to have a sibling group.  We both have siblings and we understood how important it is to be able to keep siblings groups together wherever possible. We are now proud Foster Dad’s to three amazing girls.

We had one weekend stayover, but after that we went from zero to three children in one go and it was a huge adjustment.  Our home became filled with stuff and we went straight into the summer holidays, with all three children having their birthdays over the first two weeks.  It was an intensive time and its hard to put into words what it feels like to have three children that you don’t know suddenly rely on you for everything, but we knew that it must have been so much worse for them.  To move home, to move schools, to be away from everything they knew and to move in with two complete strangers must have been terrifying. 

What was great was to see that they were there for each other and they were able to help and support one another through that change. Now, they spend lots of time squabbling and disagreeing (as all siblings do), but underneath that they have great love and compassion for one another and it’s fantastic to know that we’ve been able to keep them together when they’ve experienced so much other change and separation in their lives. 

One of the challenges of having siblings that are close in age, has been helping them to find and develop their own identities.  There can be jealousy and competition between them and so it has been important that they start to do things separately, whilst also making sure they don’t feel excluded or treated differently. Logistically this can be a challenge, but it has been worthwhile and everyone has benefited.  

The TACT South West team are great. We have been lucky to work with a few of them and we couldn’t feel more supported. They genuinely cared about finding us the right match, not any placement and were open and honest with us throughout.  We have a great Supervising Social Worker who is always happy to be contacted and has provided help, support and resources that have been invaluable to us. They are also a great support to us when we’re advocating for our foster daughters and help us to get outcomes that support all their individual needs.

No matter how challenging some days might be there is always something that our foster daughters do that will put a smile on our faces. A funny comment, a silly joke (often at our expense!), a hug or thoughtful remark can really make your day and we laugh lots as a family. They never cease to surprise and amaze us and we are so proud of how they are growing up and developing. Each step forward, each challenge they overcome, and each achievement is something that we treasure and it reminds us of why we set out to become foster carers. 

If you are seriously thinking about becoming a foster carer then don’t hesitate to get in contact with TACT to find out more.  It’s the best way to learn about fostering, to answer your questions without commitment, and to help you determine whether fostering is right for you and your family. It’s a two way process and you will never feel pressured or pushed to move forward unless you are ready.

Fostering in the South West